Put a Little Love in Your Heart

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Actually, it would be more accurate to say “open yourself to the love in your heart.” Because it’s in there, baby, no matter how bruised and battered you may feel from an outside blow. It’s there even when your heart feels closed as tight and unforgiving as a fist.

308077_4778243648928_432870953_nMost of us “close” our hearts out of fear, out of wanting to protect ourselves from pain. But in that closure, it’s not just pain we shut out–it’s, well, anything and everything. Joy. Excitement. Anticipation. Connection. Every  gift the Universe sends us.

When our hearts are closed, we don’t see any gifts anywhere. Or, if we do see them, we view them with suspicion or fear. It’s worth noting that some of the gifts the Universe sends our way can seem confusingly wrapped. They can look like amazing opportunities–and they can look like disappointments, stumbles and outright “no’s.” Consider: even what looks like a bag of dung can still fertilize and grow our dreams.

Ah, but when our hearts and minds are open, we can consider each person, each circumstance, each thing or event with fresh eyes and lack of judgment. What in the world could be good about a cancelled trip, a lost job, a loved one’s illness, the end of a relationship?

We’d love to tell you what could be good about each of those things, but honestly? We’d be guessing. Because the only person who can find the gift meant for you is, well, you.

We can give you examples: countless people we know who lost their jobs only to find their way to a better path, one more in alignment with the yearnings of their souls. Relationships that had run their course and from which both parties, once released, were able to grow. Trips that don’t materialize because the Universe had something better in store–or because something disastrous would have happened had the trip gone as planned. Illnesses that fulfilled that particular soul’s life purpose, and from which there were beautiful lessons to be learned.

But bottom line? Only you can choose to open your heart, and only you can find and feel the love intended for you in each and every outcome.

So, yes, go ahead, open up and indeed “put” a little love–the love that’s been waiting for you–in your heart. Let the love that lives inside you shine out, bright and clear and beautiful and strong.

And the world–your world–will be a better place. For you. And me. Just wait, and see.

 

Think You’re a Superstar? Well, Right You Are!

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It’s hard to top John Lennon’s lyrics when it comes to writing a pithy post about “joining the human race,” “recognizing your brothers,” and “getting yourself together.” At the heart of this classic is his message, brought home in song after song after song: we are all superstars.  And we all shine on. Like the moon, and the stars, and the sun.

Raised Vibration is about nothing less than raising the vibration of the entire planet, one superstar human being at a time. We would be honored to have you join us.

7 Warning Signs that Your Relationship Is in Trouble

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Woman Looking at a Man Sitting Beside HerRelationships go through phases, and it’s important not to confuse the weather–the storm–for the overall climate.  But sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between the normal flow and progression of a phase with signs that something’s breaking down. If we miss early warning signs, it can come as a complete shock if things break down to the point of being irreparable.

Here’s the stuff to watch out for:

1.  Your partner doesn’t touch you as often.   It’s normal for affectionate, casual, or even sexual touch to decrease a little as you move out of the passionate honeymoon phase of the relationship and into a more long term, settled phase.  But if your partner isn’t reaching for you, seldom or never initiates touching, and starts bypassing casual caresses or hand-holding, chances are, they’re not feeling the connection.

2.  You don’t spend any quality time together anymore.  Life can be busy and hectic, and without realizing it,  days and even weeks can pass without putting in quality face-to-face time with our loved ones. But being together is important to maintain you sense of connection to your partner. Make time for each other.

3.  Eye rolling.  In a fascinating experiment, the degree of eye-rolling in a relationship was found to be a very good predictor of whether or not the couple would break up. Eye rolling can become a reflexive response we don’t even realize we’re doing–but it’s devastating to the other person. It’s disdainful, disrespectful, and conveys a clear message that you’re not taking your partner seriously. So the next time you catch yourself rolling your eyes – STOP! What would happen if you smiled instead?

 4. The TV is always on and you don’t really talk anymore. This is more about a change of pattern than it is about a behavior. Some people are naturally quiet and need alone time to wind down and recharge. More extroverted types may want to talk almost all the time. Something’s wrong if one of these patterns changes within your relationship. If you used to talk and now you really don’t. If you used to watch TV together, but now you’re watching separate shows in separate rooms.  If you used to never watch TV but are now using it to avoid connecting with each other. Heads up.

5. No sex.  Put bluntly, unless you guys started out platonically, a cessation of sexual intimacy is a pretty sure-fire sign your connection is suffering. It’s normal for things to slow down as your relationship matures, but it’s also important that you still feel and express your attraction to one another. Sometimes  we just haven’t made the time, or can’t get relaxed enough–these are things you can fix. If you’re getting signals your partner doesn’t WANT things to be fixed, it’s time to start talking.  Like, yesterday.

6. It feels like a struggle. The relationship feels difficult, it doesn’t flow anymore. Communication doesn’t come easily or  naturally when you do talk, or you always seem to end up fighting or feeling frustrated. This is a sure sign that your relationship is suffering and you need to take action (see below).

7. You lose sight of each other in the everyday grind. Responsibilities and to-do lists can zap even the most energetic among us. But when this happens, the romance of your relationship can fizzle..  Left unaddressed, you can eventually lose sight of why you fell in love in the first place.

 

So now what?

First, don’t panic. Most problems are fixable with good communication, but if you approach your partner buzzing with fear and anxiety, you may do more harm than good.  So take a moment to regroup. Breathe. Trust in solutions.

Getting The Connection Back and Ramp Up the Romance

 Remember the fun, romantic things you used to do together at the beginning of your relationship?  Do more of those again. Laughing together ALWAYS builds connection, as does touch, talking, playing games, being together outdoors–even activities that take you a bit outside your comfort zone but closer TO your intimacy zone.

At the same time, do your own work on YOU. Each of you have a responsibility to yourselves as well as a commitment to each other, and that responsibility means self-care, managing your own emotions, growing and holding boundaries, and finding happiness and joy within. No partner, no matter how well-matched or amazing, can make you happy for you. It’s an inside job. When you are your best self, you are, quite simply, a better partner.

To find out more about exactly what you can do to raise your V.I.B.E., go HERE.